While studying, I often wonder, “When will this studying ever end?” Most professors and teachers generally say it takes about three years. Three years… some people say it’s faster than that, while others say you only need to study a little. I understand that recovery times vary depending on each person’s physical condition. But in my case, being told three years, I’m not sure if that’s good or bad. However, three years feels incredibly long to me. It’s just overwhelming and frustrating.
Speaking is still difficult, but to relieve this frustration, I cautiously searched for books several times. Then, by chance, I found a book titled “I Thought I Was Dead.” With a mix of curiosity and desperation, I opened the book, and there was this passage:
‘If you don’t regain your abilities within six months of a stroke, you’ll never recover.’
The moment I read this sentence, I gasped. It’s already well over a year and a half since my injury, meaning if this were true, I would never recover. My vision went dark, and all my efforts until then felt futile. A sense of despair that everything was over enveloped me. But what followed then gave me a huge shock, and at the same time, a small glimmer of hope:
“This is not true. In my case, my brain’s learning and function steadily improved for eight years after my stroke. After eight years, I felt my body and mind were fully recovered. The brain has an excellent ability to change the connection structure of cells based on external stimuli. This ‘plasticity’ of the brain becomes the fundamental power to regain lost functions.” “If genetically programmed neuronal functions are erased, these cells either die due to lack of stimulation or find other things to do. For example, in the case of vision, if one eye is patched to block stimuli from entering visual cortex cells, these cells will reach out to adjacent cells to see if there’s anything else they can do. I wanted those around me to believe in brain plasticity and its ability to grow, learn, and recover.”
Reading this passage, I thought I had to find strength again. ‘Brain plasticity,’ it meant there was still hope for me. The idea that my body and mind could fully recover with consistent effort over eight long years felt like an oasis in the desert.
However, I soon ran into the wall of reality. ‘I don’t have the money to get treatment for eight years.’ This thought filled my mind. As I mentioned in previous writings, money is one of the most crucial factors in recovery. I don’t have the financial means to cover hospital bills, treatment costs, and living expenses for eight long years. I can’t keep being a burden to my family. ‘I can’t keep being a burden to my children and wife for eight years.’ My children need to grow up, and my wife needs to live her own life. I can’t hold them back for eight years.
I want to finish this entire process within one year, two years at the longest. Eight years is too cruel for me. Even one year already feels too long, let alone eight years. Just the thought of it makes me gasp for breath. I want to recover quickly to lighten my family’s burden and reclaim my life. But reality is harsh. The hope spoken of in this book feels like a story too far away for me, leaving me only sad and frustrated. It’s an ironic situation where seeing hope brings even greater despair because that hope feels so unrealistic.
✅ Simple, Repetitive Word Practice – Speech Support (English)
- Skirt Skirt Skirt Skirt Skirt Skirt Skirt Skirt Skirt Skirt
- Elephant Elephant Elephant Elephant Elephant Elephant Elephant Elephant Elephant Elephant
- Candle Candle Candle Candle Candle Candle Candle Candle Candle Candle
- Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber
- Blender Blender Blender Blender Blender Blender Blender Blender Blender Blender
- Money Money Money Money Money Money Money Money Money Money
- Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly Dragonfly
- Gloves Gloves Gloves Gloves Gloves Gloves Gloves Gloves Gloves Gloves
- Whale Whale Whale Whale Whale Whale Whale Whale Whale Whale
- Cow Cow Cow Cow Cow Cow Cow Cow Cow Cow
- Rice Rice Rice Rice Rice Rice Rice Rice Rice Rice
- Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant Eggplant
- Spider Spider Spider Spider Spider Spider Spider Spider Spider Spider
- Snowman Snowman Snowman Snowman Snowman Snowman Snowman Snowman Snowman Snowman
- Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg